love

Being a momma is unreal.  

I've thought a lot about how important it was to me that I dedicate a post about how motherhood has been so far but I've also thought about how i am not great with words so hopefully this post just helps me remember these feelings.

I never knew I could love someone so much until I looked my baby in the eyes. She brings me more joy than imagined- even those feedings at 3am I feel so much love and blessings.  Motherhood is also such a battle.  I am constantly worried, worried about her health, her development, her future.  I find myself constantly discouraged because I don't produce enough milk so we have to supplemental feed her as well. I feel ashamed because I can feel people judging me for that.  When honestly it shouldn't matter- and it doesn't.  But as a mom you feel so much pressure. I know I am far from perfect but I also know that no one loves my baby as much as i do... maybe her dad... ;)  I hope and dream for my little girl that she is smart, that the sky is never ending and she can conquer the world.  I hope that we can teach her the importance of independence and a strong education. I want to give her the world. 

I LOVE being a momma, even with all the frustration, stresses, and feelings of defeat.  She makes me feel whole, she completes our family, she is my world.  I will spend the rest of my life being the best person I can be to be the best momma I can be and I will always love her unconditionally.